Author: Zeng Xiaoliang.
Picture: photo net.
Source: marriage and Family Magazine (ID:hunyinyujiating99).
What do men usually think after divorce?
To paraphrase Tolstoy: men who are passionately in love are all the same, but men who break up are different.
There are extremes.
For example, there is a man who likes to commit domestic violence against his wife.
The wife finally couldn't stand it any longer and broke up. But after the breakup, the man was unwilling.
From a psychological point of view, this man's domestic violence with the shadow of childhood, seems to control his wife through violence, in fact, violence is also the devil to control him.
Therefore, when the woman proposed to break up, he pestered and beat each other, hoping to get the woman back.
His ex-wife never looked back, so one day, he went to his ex-wife's house with a powder gun and shot several people.
There are also noble ones.
For example, when a man broke up with his wife after an affair, he said to his wife, "I am sorry to you. All the property, including the children, is left to you, and I am clean out of the house."
As a result, his generosity moved his wife to tears, and now he and his ex-wife are still like good friends.
There are also pennies.
For example, after a man broke up, he took a list of expenses over the years and said, "Let's AA." You are in Shanghai and I am in Beijing. I usually visit you more often, so you only need to reimburse my fare halfway to Xuzhou.
There are also those who work without complaining.
For example, there was a man who suddenly discovered the beauty of his wife after breaking up and kept taking advantage of various opportunities such as visiting children, repairing plumbing, delivering food and oil, and so on, to go home and hope to renew his relationship with his wife.
Don't say, just do.
Hope to change his wife's mind through his own practical actions.
The TV series "Marvin's War" describes this kind of psychology. After Marvin broke up with his ex-wife, he suddenly felt sour about his ex-wife falling in love with someone else. .
Men are just like veterans who landed in Normandy. Even if they hand over their sovereignty to others one day, they are still unwilling to do so.
So how to get along with men after breaking up?
Sometimes, the man seems unwilling, seems to have a change of heart, such as constantly looking back and eager to get back together.
But most of the time, you have to think: does he really change his mind, or is he unwilling to lose? Even after you get back together, can those potential problems really be completely solved?
Therefore, after a breakup, even if you can be friends with your ex-husband, you should draw a line between your new life and your past life.
For example, I told myself in my heart that this man is a thing of the past, even though he seems to have many advantages from a distance, but fate is no longer.
If you are afraid, you are afraid of being friends and playing ambiguous games at the same time.
The newspaper reported such a thing:
There was a woman who remarried soon after she divorced her ex-husband for two years. The new husband is considerate to himself. She should be content with such a day. But after the divorce, the ex-husband was not very happy and often went back to her to complain about his troubles.
At first, out of sympathy and kindness, she patiently listened to her ex-husband, but over time, her ex-husband became more and more considerate and more and more inseparable from her.
In short, they began to enjoy the pleasure of having an affair. From husband and wife in the past to underground lovers now, the pleasure of stealing seems to be more exciting and wonderful.
But there was no fire in the paper, and her relationship with her ex-husband was discovered by her present husband. The husband was so devastated that he swore that he would never forgive her again. .
So, after breaking up, in the face of your ex-husband's ambiguous request, you should make up your mind:
Is it just a moment of emotion and passion, or is it a deep reflection after calming each other down? Do you really want to renew your relationship, or is it best to continue to go your separate ways?
In most cases, they are bound to go their separate ways.
The best after a breakup is probably:
Even if we can still be friends, we should forget the love of yesterday and cherish each other in our hearts.